Best Techniques for Using Thai Online Dating
There are a number of techniques that can be used to improve your overall success on Thai online dating sites. For some, that first time may seem a little daunting, but is does not have to be. By adopting certain attitudes and basic rules, online dating can be successful and enjoyable. Positiveness and politeness can go a long way to crossing cultural barriers and even language barriers. The more open, honest and approachable one appears, the more people are attracted to speak with that individual. The following will assist those who are venturing into Thai online dating for the first time.
Be honest – People Prefer Honesty Over all Other Traits
The number one thing people across the board are looking for is someone who is honest. In fact, honest is the word that Thai women mention the most when describing their perfect match with foreigners. Thai women do not like being lied too. Thais generally do not like sarcasm, as it is considered rude and offensive. When using online dating you may be tempted to stretch the truth a bit to present yourself in the best light. This is totally understandable, but the large majority of Thai women prefer honesty and openness in preference to someone who tries to be something their not.
“Honesty is the Best Policy”
Whilst Thai language has many nuances similar to English, when a Thai speaks English, it is mostly direct and to the point. This may be due to the methods that are used to teach English. The result is that written and verbal English communication with the majority of Thais will be direct and to the point. When answering these questions, it is wise to be direct in answering questions, whilst remaining polite.
If you are no longer interested in having more children in future relationships, it is much wiser to be honest and state this when the matter is raised. Honesty is the best policy, particularly when important things are being discussed. Similarly when discussing the potential of changing residential locations to be with a future partner, honesty is best. Being honest and open about such matters can save relationship failure and personal hardship at a later date.
Make Yourself Easy To Talk with
The easier you are to talk with and to make contact with, the more contact you will have. One of the main functions of an online dating profile, is helping people come up with ways to start a conversation with you. The more information you have about yourself for others to view, the better for them and you. Often after you’ve matched with someone, they’ll check out your profile to try and come up with something to say. If you have very little information, or don’t have anything someone could form a question about, they might just be at a loss for words.
A solid and fully completed profile is essential to success when using online dating sites. Remember, you are intending to make contact with multiple Thai women who use English as a second language. Your level of spoken and written English can make a huge difference, both in your profile and when you are sending messages. Usually, more direct English language is easier to understand for most who speak English as a second language. Keep your slang to a minimum and try to be as clear and precise as possible to increase the level of understanding.
“A Complete Profile in Clear English Language Improves Your Success”
Communication problems will arise. English is a complex language and there will be words and phrases that will be misunderstood or not understood at all. When this occurs, simply laugh it off and offer to explain it again using a different method. When this is done politely, nobody will take offence. Everyone remains happy and the communication remains light-hearted.
Writing That First Message
First impressions mean everything. First impressions can make or break opportunities for further contact. First and foremost, act politely and respectfully even if it is not returned. Being polite is not only about one on one communication, it is about maintaining a certain status and/or level of behaviour whilst using online dating sites. By default, the large majority of Thai women will show a level of respect to foreigners. This is a wonderful gesture and it is not to be taken lightly. It is wise to act in a manner than maintains that level of respect permanently.
Always use the Thai woman’s user name from her profile when addressing her. On many occasions she will respond by introducing herself with her correct name and things can go from there. Before jumping in and firing off a message ASAP, take the time to read her profile. Hopefully, she will have sufficient information in her profile for you to find something in common with to discuss further.
Tailor the message to your goals and the person you are writing to. You don’t want to give a beautiful woman a physical compliment because it won’t have a huge effect on her. Likewise you don’t want to tease someone who comes across like they might not be the most confident person. Polite, respectful and honest is the best method for success.
“Polite and Respectful Behaviour Works Achieves the Best Results”
Read her profile and judge the level of her English to determine where it was learnt and if possible, ascertain what style of language you can use to communicate with her. In many cases, Thai women with tertiary qualifications will be extremely proud to list them. In Thailand, tertiary education is highly enviable and can lead to many opportunities. The completion of a tertiary qualification clearly indicates a level of commitment to an interest or career. There are plenty of opportunities here to discuss this at a later date.
Polite, respectful and honest. Introduce yourself with some pleasant welcomes and state that you would like to know more things about her, if she would agree to talk with you. This leaves the decision totally with her and she can either decide a simple yes or no. Remember, don’t lose the respect automatically given by default. The message does not have to be long or detailed. One simple polite sentence can be sufficient to get things started.
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Messages, Messages and More Messages
The communication has started and there are messages going back and forth. There is no hurry to complete a certain number of messages. The quality of the messages is definitely more important than the number. The far better tactic is to take it slow, like you would meeting this Thai woman in real life. Introduce yourself further in a way that is clear enough for her to understand but intriguing enough that they want to write you back, find out more, and strike up a conversation.
She will have questions and don’t be offended if her language is quite direct. This is not meant to offend, it is the way many Thais have been instructed in English. The type of instruction is quite mechanical and focuses on the construction rather than prowess. Expect questions about children, your time in Thailand previously, marriage in your own country and even your employment.
“Quality of Messaging is More Important than Quantity”
If you can’t come up with anything interesting to say, her profile is the place that may assist you with more questions. She will have a number of entries in her profile and there will be a few items that can be used to strike more conversation. Remember to be honest in your responses. Asking good quality questions is especially important in the online dating scene because it can be hard to get people to reply to you. The level and tone is important when writing to a Thai woman.
Asking a few intelligent, well thought out questions, however, gives them a reason to respond, while at the same time showing something about yourself. Try to find something that most people may have missed. Does she love an obscure movie that you’ve also seen? Has he been to a country that you love? Is she doing a degree in a subject that you have knowledge about? Find something that you can grab hold of and use, whether that’s a specific piece of information or just a vibe you’re getting. Tailor your message around that. Clear and precise in your messaging is the key to success. It can avoid many language and cultural barriers during communications.
Dealing With Rudeness
Everybody has an off day, but that is no excuse to take it out on another. There are rude people in every location and online dating sites are no exception. At times, there is no intention to be rude, it is simply a misunderstanding of the use of English language. This can occur with Thai women due to the way they are taught to learn the language. Many dating websites offer premium features that provide both parties to write in their first language and be automatically translated. This is highly beneficial but the translation order of words and phrases are sometimes garbled due to the sentence construction differences between Thai and English.
If you believe a Thai has been rude to you, it is wise to simply move on and block the contact within the dating site. There is no reason to accept or condone poor behaviour, and the easiest method of recovering from instances of rudeness is to block, ignore and move on to others that are keen to talk with you. Forgetting those who are on the site for the wrong reasons is the best way to deal with these individuals.
Don’t Talk about Previous Dating Experiences Unless Asked
People seem to enjoy talking about most things. It is unwise to discuss previous experiences or actions on online dating sites unless specifically asked a question relating to this. Thai women are inquisitive and the question will be asked, but this is one case where it is wise to avoid the subject until asked.
Comments such as these will create bad vibes and instant negativity;
“None of the other dating apps have worked so now I’m here”
“I hate dating but want to meet someone” or
“Not interested in talking back and forth forever before meeting up”
You Will Most Likely Be Checked in Some Way
The online dating scene in Thailand is quite mature and therefore a wealth of information is available online for Thais to study and receive advice prior to commencing dating foreigners. Much of this information comes in forums where dedicated areas are provided for those more experienced to assist those less experience with answering questions about everything to do with talking and meeting with foreigners.
It may be surprising to some that there are specific areas for truth checking foreigners’ profiles when there may be some potential discrepancies. One of the most prominent websites is www.ladyinter.com. This site is a wealth of information (both good and bad) provided in Thai language for Thais. This forum discusses all forms of communication with foreigners and solutions are provided by those claiming to be more experienced.
One forum section is dedicated to posting the member pages of foreigners who somebody would like checked or reported on in some way or another. The photo and the member’s details are shown and other site posters can provide information of their own personal dealings with this person and discussions may entail the level of honesty this person displays.
Right or wrong, these types of forums / websites exist in Thailand to serve as a form of information service to those Thais seeking relationship advice for communicating with and dating foreigners. Much of the information provided can be beneficial to those Thais seeking advice. Knowing that these types of sites exist further confirms that honesty is the best policy when providing information to online dating sites and participating in their services.